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Well, we all know she’s still missing. And you’ll be glad to know she was nowhere to be seen in the Baltics!!

No posters, no mention in the news, and no pictures of fit killer Kate. Nada. After four months of watching them around the world, it took a bit of getting used to the fact that Maddie didn’t follow me round this time!

Watching the O’Reilly Factor on Fox News and noticed how many times the word ‘far-left’ is said by the eponymous host. Never realised that ut it does make sense that he should say it. Not surprisingly, the word ‘far-right’ is never uttered - not even when he’s talking about neo-Nazi youths.

Far-left topics coming up - the body-language of far-leftists Hillary Clinton, Dan Rather and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad - what a bunch of nutters!

I have a habit of deliberately not watching the Rugby World Cup, and to be honest, I wouldn’t even know it was happening if I didn’t read it in the newapapers or look on the BBC Sports website.

The reason is simple: ITV, which holds the rights to the contest, doesn’t actually broadcast many of the matches on its main channel, ITV1.

Instead, ITV4 broadcasts the lion’s share of the matches on weekday evenings whilst ITV1 sticks rigidly to its diet of crappy soaps and equally crappy reality shows. Nor do they even bother with highlights programmes, and instead leaves that to ITV4 which shows it at midnight!!

I’d read how much the channel has improved its coverage from the 2003 finals (and so it should given it only broadcasts rugby once every four friggin’ years) but that doesn’t mean we should tolerate this kind of shitty treatment of a global event by the exclusive rights holder in the country. If Sky or the BBC had the live rights, you can bet your bottom dollar that they would never show Police fucking Camera Action instead of Fiji vs Samoa!

The ‘Tim’ in question - Mr Henman, six-time tennis Grand Slam semi-finalist and one of the least-appreciated and underrated British sports stars. He retired over the weekend after a lengthy and pretty distinguished career.

But the majority of the British public won’t see it that way - they judge him by his annual failure to win Wimbledon, a charge which is grossly unfair given the majority of these people follow tennis for precisely fourteen days during the year.

To those of us who watch the sport year in, year out, and have followed Henman’s fortunes at far-flung events and at other Grand Slams, we just cannot and do not see it that way. My own favourite Henman moment was easily his unexpected victory over Juan Ignacio Chela at the quarter-final of the 2004 French Open, in particular the incredulity on Henman’s face as he shook the Argentine’s hands at the end of the match, probably wondering how he managed to beat a renowned clay-courter so comprehensively.

Although he lost his next match - in very bizarre circumstances - against Guillermo Coria (a drug-cheat) in the semi-finals, my respect for Henman was fully realised then, knowing that here was a great performer not just on grass, but also on clay and, as he proved later that season by also reaching the semis at Flushing Meadows, equally effective on the hard-court.

So thank you Mr Henman. I shall miss you and the eleven years of fun you’ve given us on primetime television!

Greetings from Stockholm, and at the end of my mini-Baltic tour.

I’m actually very pleased to be saying that as I’ve wanted to visit Sweden ever since I was about five, along with Norway, Denmark and Iceland. But not Finland. In fact, I never quite understand why everybody goes to Sockholm - or at least want to go there - and not Helsinki. Having now visited both, it’s not hard to see why.

I was in the Finnish capital for a day on Tuesday, having boated across from Tallinn in Estonia. That was my second time ever in Helsinki and much like the first, it was an underwhelming experience. Ok, it’s a nice city, plenty of parks and not many people blah blah blah. BUT, when you compare that to Stockholm, it’s no contest. Stockholm has history, Helsinki has little; Stockholm looks pretty in the rain, Helsinki struggles to look good even in the sun. A lot has to do with the fact that the former is surrounded by water whereas Helsinki has a lot less of it. Then again, I think a lot of cities would struggle to compete with Stockholm in terms of beauty and functionality. But there’s something about Helsinki that doesn’t click with me and I can’t quite pinpoint what that is. It’s stupidly expensive as well though it does have my favourite airport in the world (everytime I’ve been there, my planes have always taken off on schedule, if not, early!), and its train station looks pretty damn good too. Otherwise, only go there if you’re in Estonia. Helsinki’s only eighty minutes away by ferry, you can easy do a day-trip in from Tallinn and not having to stay in their stupendously over-priced hotels.

So whilst Helsinki languishes near the bottom of my list of cities - along with Nicosia, Paris and Singapore - Stockholm goes straight into the top five, helped by the fact that I love Swedish food. But, there is a very strange and curious phenomenon in that a lot of people spits in public here! Even the women do that! And they do it everywhere! It’s the sort of thing which has been outlawed in Hong Kong and China because of the Sars crisis and they might need one to put a stop to it. The other thing that I find slightly odd are the obscene number of 7-Elevens and Bentley taxis here. Also, no squirrels but plenty of hares in the parks! An oddly charming place indeed! But, it’s not as odd as Ã…land, where I was before arriving in Stockholm. Ã…land is a semi-autonomous Finnish archipelago of 6000 islands in the middle of the Baltic Sea which is owned by the Finns but speaks Swedish, and when they had their first-ever bank robbery last year, the robber got told off by an old woman behind the counter that in future he should at least rob a bank in bad Swedish rather than in Finnish, which few people understand. That probably encapsulates what Alanders are like, I suppose! Seriously though, it’s an exceptionally beautiful but random place to visit and I’d urge you all to give it a go soon because it might not be around any longer if the sea-levels continue to rise! Fuck Helsinki! You can fly to Ã…land from Stockholm or better still, catch a booze-cruise from Sweden and play bingo with Swedish pensioners on board. (I declined).

Evening from Stockholm – and a brand new country to my list. Never been to Sweden – not even remotely close. And being in the Swedish capital also means I can now take one of my childhood dreams off my list. It also means my journey across the Baltic is now at an end, having crossed from Tallinn to Helsinki by ferry, followed by a small propeller plane to Mariehamn in the semi-autonomous region of Aland in the middle of the Baltics, before a final boat-trip from there onto Kappelskar in Sweden, not far from Stockholm. Aland to Stockholm took just 4 hours and cost a mere eight euros, which is certainly a fantastic alternative to flying – however nice Air Aland was.

It certainly ended on a dry and sunny note, having got spectacularly drenched in soggy Helsinki yesterday. Honestly, I’ve never stayed in Helsinki for longer than a day (the three occasions I’ve been there read as follows – 2hrs – 10hrs - 22hrs) and the weather has been different every time – from the 31 degrees I experienced in August 2001 to the eight degrees with wind and rain which battered me all day yesterday.

Still, shouldn’t complain since what else do you expect in Scandinavia in September? The soaking though, couldn’t have prepared me for the superb weather which greeted my arrival in Aland this afternoon. During my four-hour stay on the island – a lunch, a business meeting and a very quick stroll around town – the sun was out and could feel the sweat dripping down my forehead, thoroughly enjoying the fact that there wasn’t a single cloud to be found in the sky. The piercing autumnal sunshine also showed the archipelago in all its spectacular glory – beautiful coastlines, weird little low-lying islands, charming houses and some stunning-looking yachts. Four hours is way too short to do the archipelago any justice – I know I’ve barely left the place but it’s already shot up to near-top of my to-visit places.

The same can’t really be said for Helsinki, however. Twice I’ve been there now and I’ve failed to ‘connect’ with the city on both occasions. Sure, I like the city and its superb transport system but there’s virtually nothing or little to keep me amused were I to ever stay beyond one night. I basically revisited some of the old places I went to in 2001 yesterday – Olympic Stadium, Senate Square and rides on the tram etc but it wasn’t anything special. I did go to a group of islands called Suomilinna – a UNESCO site which is fifteen minutes away be ferry and it was spooky (quiet, tourist-free) and nice. But I really think very little of the place as a whole. Toilets are expensive and wi-fi was hard to find. I would therefore need to find a very good reason for wanting to go there again in the near future. I think it’s also time to try out other cites – Turku, Lahti and Tonio all sound very random but probably fun. That does mean I probably won’t be going back to my favourite airport in the world though – Vantaa International Airport in Helsinki. In short, it’s the only airport I’ve ever been to in the world which lets planes take off early- as Buzz did in 2001 (“we can leave now since we’ve everybody on board”, said the pilot). Today, my flight was scheduled for take off at 10.40. It took off at 10.40. Oh how I’ll miss the airport!

Gonna keep this short as I’m wet and tired. In fact, that will do. Yes, I’ve had a great day here in Helsinki and yes, I had a great meal but I need to get some rest. Not slept much lately and it’s catching up on me at last. So farewell Helsinki - back when it’s warmer!

Greetings from Tallinn, Estonia.

Then again, maybe I could just write ‘Tallinn’, rather than ‘Tallinn, Estonia’ since most people now seem to know where this place is. More tellingly perhaps, is that post-office workers no longer have to ask me where Estonia is - as they did a few years back. That certainly was’t the case when I was last here back in 2001. Then, Estonia was still just outside the EU, a Eurovision victory seemed unlikely, and there were certainly no cheap flights or stag weekends to be found here or in neighbouring Latvia or Lithuania. Fast forward six years and it’s all changed - plus a lot more. Building sites are everywhere, as are casinos and strip-clubs (’tis also the place of my first-ever visit to a strip-club six years ago). Chinese tourists are very visible and there are now three airlines which fly here direct from London, with BA and Easyjet joining Estonian Air.I plumped for the cheapest one of course, and I have to say, Easyjet is easily one of the best I’d been on this year - and there have been a few! OK, the flight was at 06.50, but with no seat allocation, it was an open invitation for me to snare one of those emergency exit seats to accommodate my legs. Why nobody chose them I do not know, but I wasn’t going to compromise on tiredness and comfort just because some dodgy documentary out last year suggested that you have more chances of dying in a plane crash in those seats than anywhere else on a plane.

Of course, I didn’t come here for a holiday but for work purposes. But since I have an old friend here, and through a bit of devious plotting, I managed to engineer a business trip to Stockholm via Tallinn (a canny detour?). It was just pure chance that there happen to be a couple of clients I could meet here. And it was weirder to learn that one of the clients I saw today happens to be an old family friend of my Estonian friend’s boyfriend. Small world. Small country but a great place nonetheless. It was charming (read quaint/boring but pretty) back in 2001, it’s even better now as the locals seem less wary of tourists and have at least stopped gawping at any coloured individuals. Certainly, this being a Monday meant all the stag parties have disappeared until the weekend. The Estonians’ American accents still annoy me slightly - but that’s nothing compared to the Finns when I go to Helsinki tomorrow morning.

So I’ve managed to kill two birds with one stone - all thanks to my boss. Honestly, this job I have is becoming increasingly random by the month. I’m off to some weird island in Finland tomorrow before crossing the the Baltic by boat to Stockholm on Wednesday evening. So whilst other companies send their sales people to glamorous places such as New York or Tokyo, I get Tallinn and Northern Cyprus by easyjet and hydrofoils - and I know which ones I’d prefer!

It is indeed good to be back - in Tallinn, Estonia.

After a six year gap, I’ve come back to Tallinn for a very brief visit, cramming in clients, friends, sight-seeing and lots of gorgeous food. When I was last here - a few weeks before 9/11 (which seems like a lifetime ago now), Estonia wasn’t even in the EU, let alone become a haven for stag-parties. Admittedly, I don’t remember a great deal about the Tallinn of 2001 so can’t make a fair judgement on what has changed during the intervening period. Suffice to say, the visual differences are not hard to find - as they are very obvious to the naked eye - building sites all over the place, strip-clubs belting out very loud music at every other street, as well as new, modern trams and buses compared with the old, creaky Sovier-era trolley buses of the past.
But the highlight, as always, is meeting up with some old friends over a decent meal in quiet restaurant. It’s Sunday and the weather has turned decidedly chilly of late. The stags have returned to the UK whilst most tourists won’t return until next June. Perfect for someone like me who likes it quiet and English
people-free!

And by the way, despite a two-and-a-half hour sleep last night, I thoroughly enjoyed my flight over on easyJet today. It was my first trip on the airline since flying to Amsterdam five years ago, and it was a most pleasant journey, aided by the fact that seats were not allocated, and I chose the best seats on the plane - right by the fire-exit which came with more leg-room than almost every other row on the seat. The big question is - why did no one sit there? Anything to do with that Ryanair documentary a few months back which had sitting on fire-exits as the most-likely rows to die during a plane-crash?

What a turnaround! Four months ago, just before I left for Vancouver, the Madeleine McCann case first surfaced and made its way into the media spotlight.

What followed was a whole series of sickening media stunts by her parents to keep the campaign to find their missing daughter in the public eye, from roping in Beckham for the appeal to the disgusting visit to the Vatican for an audience with the Pope, my dislike for them grew stronger as the tiresome duo continued with their sop story around the world.

But not anymore! Wow, are we in for some exicting finishes here?! Both the parents are now treated as murder suspects by the Portuguese authorities and are legging it back to the UK! How exicting! Well, I couldn’t care less whether they are suspects or not (though it does make the whole saga all the more fun) but it does mean that little Maddie is probably dead, which at least brings to an end one chapter of this protracted case. We can therefore bring closure to this and concentrate on convicting the murderers. And if the murderes happen to be Kate and Gerry McCann, then great - daughter’s dead, parents are guilty - what more could you want in a real-life drama?! And frankly, the sooner they get thrown into prison the better as I’m sick of the story and the sooner it is over and done with the better!

And by the way, the McCanns vowed not to return to the UK until they found their Maddie. By legging it back home as soon as they were fingered as the prime suspects is as good as an admission of guilt!